Recall one month ago that I marked one year by finding a chip wagon and indulging on some deep fried goodness. It occurred to me that since then, I haven't stopped eating. It might have been that way before, but I've only just noticed.
Some recent examples (thankfully not all on the same day):
- I ate 2/3 of a baguette for snack the other day. So what, you ask? That was after the 3/4 of a box of cereal, with 1/2 box of rice milk.
- That box of 50 Timbits at the office? My coworkers did a good job with it, but wait - nobody wants the 10 plain ones! Thank me later, I took care of them.
- Great, Halloween is coming soon! Thanks for the bowl of chocolates. I'll just eat 3 mini Oh Henry! bars and a pack of REESE'S Peanut Butter Cups Miniatures
- Wandering through the grocery store, I found 50% off a 3 pack of REESE'S Peanut Butter Cups Miniatures. Yup, bought them and ate them too.
It's been a crappy week, and I've called in sick today because my head would explode otherwise. I'm currently sitting in the basement, far away from the batch of chocolate chip cookies my wife baked yesterday. I've already eaten 3 for after breakfast dessert. Breakfast which consisted of a slice of toast, two fried eggs, a glass of orange juice and our child's leftover peanut butter toast.
I'd never really been a compulsive person, but this whole doored/concussion/acquired brain injury/traumatic brain injury thing has changed me. My willpower has been diminished, my focus and concentration are still poor on many days. Probably related.
I understand now why people eat for comfort. Some people drink, some people do drugs, some people do other things. Apparently I fall into the eating category. Now that I've noticed, I can stop... while my metabolism can still keep up. Over the past year I haven't changed weight much, but that's mostly because all my muscle has changed to fat as a redult of my inability to do the high intensity activities that I used to. Walking several kilometers a day is "fun", but I'm looking forward to getting back on track soon. Winter's coming... skating, snowboarding, sledding, etc.
Oops... got sidetracked there. Anyways.... hi I'm D. I have an Traumatic Brain Injury and I'm going to stop eating so much. I'm going to damn well try anyways.